Recent reviews by Kek-O

This game saved my marriage, my relationship with my children, as well as my life.

You may not believe it, however, it is very possible for a form of media to entirely transform someone. Though I was skeptical beforehand, after playing Zort, I get it now.

After booting up, I saw color for first time, I smell and touched and tasted all the world had, just like a newborn once again. Zort made me a virgin to the experiences of life. Zort rebirthed me. Zort is my renaissance. Zort is my eternal Lord and Savior.

It is to the very sanctity of my life that I owe Zort everything. Zort is messiah, Zort is Savior, Zort is us. As we become and evolve into a different species, we must remember the fundamental principles of life that Zort teaches us. Without his wisdom, we are most certainty doomed. As within Zort exists salvation, outside his mighty kingdom, we are immediately met by damnation.

Buy. Download. Become Saved.

The Devs simply cannot listen to their community, and seem to actively be competing against their own game.

If you want to make a game reliant on grinding for resources, make grinding fun. I understand new changes and challenges were needed to do so, but quite frankly, now it's become unbalanced and more importantly, unfun.

This new hotfix rivals hotfix 69 in stupidity. PvP isn't reliant on skill, but loot. In arena, a gamemode that was designed to take PvP players out of normal dungeons, they've now made it so that you lose most loot upon losing a match, just like in dungeons. So why even play?

Making exits single-use again, and boss "endless" portals not endless reverts the changes that the most recent wipe introduced, that actually made playing fun. being able to reliably escape from a dungeon when you're in danger was a useful feature that made the dungeons feel casual. This is not, nor ever will be, a competitive game, please stop trying to fix it into being one, you are only killing your player base.

This is not an E-Sport, this is a game. Games should be fun. Update your game to make it fun, not an E-Sport.

Boss grinding should be a little frustrating, not infuriating. Player fights should be better balanced, 250+ gear score limit is not enough.

They got so close with this new wipe, and as always, are competing against themselves to ruin their work.
Player base is dying, money is drying up, what does that tell you?

Fix your pathetic excuse of a development team, and get in touch with your community.
#firesdf, because this is becoming becoming insufferable.

Don't bother, play Dark and Darker Instead

They've literally stolen multiple assets, mechanics, and coding from DaD and copy-pasted it into a mobile game engine. I haven't seen graphics this laughably amateur and pixelated since I played Fortnite mobile on sh*tbox settings.

DO NOT DOWNLOAD THIS GAME
GO GET DARKER AND DARKER INSTEAD

I used to think that the people from the days of yore were ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ for obliterating the dodo birds from the face of the Earth simply for their own amusement.

Then I got to try it, and now I understand. I am addicted to beating innocent, flightless birds to death with naught but my bare hands

Whoever spends their delicate time programming and designing the jiggle-box physics on some of these anime models needs a new hobby, or at least shouldn't do it for free.

Yes there's booba, but there's also little Scottish men running around as otters eating chips and macking cheese, calling you things you don't even know existed as insults, or even existed as words.

Hard to give this review, especially since this is a game I enjoy.

I enjoy when fights run smoothly, hitting nice shots, even extracting solo with no fights and the PvE elements. Even though the lore is way too self-indulgent and super edgy (though not as edgy as when it came out), it still has charm. The art style has a unique, gritty charm, and even if the rendering utilities do give you what looks like a heaping pile of ♥♥♥♥ for what should be trees about 50 meters away from you, it's still has amazing graphics at times. Miraculously, cheaters aren't too apparent, at least for me the US; even if there are questionable players, it's once every 10 games at the most frequent for me.

That being said, there's some glaring issues.

The hit reg is a joke, I seriously haven't seen bullets landing with such dice-roll chances of hitting since... well, ever.

I can't tell if it's latency dependent or favors laggier players, because even on low ping, shots <15 meters away from opponents still have a snowballs chance in hell of hitting. Strangely enough, it feels more responsive the higher ping you play on, giving lag-switches a potentially game breaking advantage: a type of cheat I have seen abused in this game. The entire hitreg system has a huge influence from luck it seems. There have been times on 27 ping across multiple days and multiple games I have shot someone not only first, but directly in the chest with slugs, not only do they not die, the bullet magically passes right through them without damaging them, and they kill me. It's like the David Copperfield trick where he passes an ice pick through his bicep, except if you just pushed it, handle and all, through his arm only for him to stab you to death with it. This issue pops up with every gun, the only thing that even has remotely consistent hitreg is the melee weapons, and that should be the opposite case for any other FPS title similar to.

Hit reg needs a lot of love, and whatever code they're using is not only inconsistent, it's just simply not enough.

This is extremely frustrating, but the sound system is also poor. It's not bad, just muddied. I understand Crytek is big on using their own utilities, but if you recreated this game on the source engine, it would play about 4x more smoothly and better, with clear and crisp audio as well as an actual hitreg system. The audio passes through too many environmental filters, and though I understand they're trying to be realistic, as someone who has spent time on the bayou in Lousiana, as well as around horses and firearms, I'll be the first to tell you, this is not realistic at all.

Also, if you want realism, add bullet drop? The concession to include only bullet travel time, completely neglecting drop and wind and humidity, as they tout a realistic hunting experience, is a total joke: not to mention it's entirely inconsistent as well.

I like this game, a lot, in fact I bought this game back in 2017 and have been watching it grow and play throughout the years. I've thoroughly enjoyed witnessing the game get the love it has, and have enjoyed it's progression through time. However, until the hit reg system makes shooting people feel like shooting people and not throwing ♥♥♥♥ at a shed hoping to pass it through the slots between boards, it remains barely playable for more than 3 or 4 games.

Don't buy it, it's just rage bait.

RewindApp should consider renaming this to Driving with Depression Simulator

As a Giga Chad I deem this 80s synthwave driving sim officially GOATed with the sauce bussin bussin unironicalizzy litty af no cap on jah on jitt no schlatt fr fr 100 no kizzy on twizzy for rizzy ligthskin rizz pogchamp omegalul gigalul kappa alpha male sigma grindset beta destroyer stacy pounder karen ender kyle monster white lifted squatted ford f150 offroad capability wrangler apache cherokee ultima civic sienna sierra highlander subaru forester 4x4 v12 twin turbo straight piped quad fuel injector F1 rollcage forklift certified it come w/ eggwuh free robux fortnite vbux sadge champ MLG pro getquickscoped gg scrub get rekt get shrekt glizzy gladiator oh baby a triple thomas the dank engine that's going in the vod clip it get ♥♥♥♥ on summit1g shroud DrDisrespect Tyler "fortnite" Ninja Blevins s1mple are you kidding me this isn't FPL this is a major INHUMAN REACTIONS he jut like me fr Taxi Driver Drive Blade Runner 2049 American Psycho synthwave god

penis sword
look for it
download it
use it

I'm starting to understand why some people swear by DMT, because when I'm playing this game, it's like I'm connected to the Earth and all her godly deities.
The first time I booted up Garfield Kart, I completely dissociated and had a full ego dissolution, it was as though my mind body and soul were separated for the first time in eons of debilitating stress and pressure. I cannot explain the levels of cosmic pleasure that the entire experience left me in, I came out an entirely different person and an infinitely healthier human at that. The scary thing is, the entire time I was exploring the cosmos in this 4th dimensional dreamscape that Garfield and Kart sent me to, I had no concept of time, it felt as though my existence in this spirit realm was an entire epoch of human history, however, when I returned from my inner eye-opening journey, only 2 minutes and 14 seconds had passed. It was as though the game was a portal to an alternate dimension in which your soul experiences everything essential for a perfectly healthy growth and development, so the body and mind it returns to will be nourished and successful, all in a time that seems completely necessary and apt, but only experienced as such, with the time spent in such a fantastical realm being minimal by the standards of which we live in.

The second time I played this game, I was transported to what seemed like a completely white movie set, something out of the scene in matrix, in front of myself was Garfield, the god himself. In the voice of Bill Murray, just like in the 2003 film, I received a telekinetic line of thought/communication, asking me to take a pill. I could either take the Garf pill, or the Monday Pill. If I took the Monday Pill, I'd wake up before the day began, At approximately 2:14 A.M. In an alternate timeline where I never discovered Garfield Kart, and the profound realities of the world which I would discover playing it would remain unknown and I could live in a peaceful bliss, without the absolutely mind shattering reality I will encounter if I keep playing. However, taking the Garf pill would result in me becoming a total Op-Silon Male, no not an ep-silon male, an op-silon male, urban dictionary it if unfamiliar. I would travel the mental and physical cosmos, an accumulation of all the physical power of the universe in one being, I would become not just immortal, but God himself, the divine ruler of all that is, was, and will be. I took the Garf pill. All the universe funneled through my being, my soul expanded and shrunk simultaneously, all the emotions, sensations, feelings, all at once. Every portion of knowledge in languages both familiar and foreign, and concepts communicated without language at all, amalgamated into what I only have the word "soul" to describe, but it felt like something more, separate from any form of identity. I had become something more permanent than time, I had become God.

Third time I played Garfield Kart, I actually had the power to progress pass the main menu, and almost had an epileptic seizure of sheer orgasmic joy when I saw the graphics, as Sam Hyde once said, "When you fire this game up your little nuts are gonna be quakin' buddy, YOUR LITTLE NUTS ARE GONNA BE QUAKING! YOUR GONNA SHOOT ♥♥♥! HOT ♥♥♥ ALL OVER YOUR RAZER KEYBOARDS!!!!"

That's all I've accumulated in my .6 hours of playtime, feel free to interpret that how you will.

Women fear me, fish fear me, men turn their eyes away from me as I walk, no beast dare makes a sound in my presence, I am alone on this barren earth.

My training has taken me over. I am emotionless, an apathetic machine built, not just any machine, the best and most efficient automaton imaginable. I am superior, unmatched, a fabrication made by Uncle Sam to be the most elite tool he has. I am his tool, I serve his name and his people and his ideals. I am the pinnacle, the peak, I am beyond improvement, I have reached godliness as I stand at the precipice of the the very skill that defines me.

I am but designed for one purpose: fishing