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-- Fred Allen
🤗
A statesman is a politician who's been dead 10 or 15 years.
-- Harry S. Truman
😪
It's your child versus mine! The winner will be showered with praise,
the loser will be taunted and booed until my throat is sore.
-- Homer Simpson
Lisa on Ice
🤥
"Mr. Watson, come here, I want you." -- Alexander Graham Bell
🙂
[Stewie reads a card and discovers his name written inside as the sender]
Stewie: Did you forge my name? How dare you. Is this backwards "S" supposed to be cute? Oh, I'm going to crap double for you tonight.
😯
The University of California Bears announced the signing of Reggie
Philbin to a letter of intent to attend Cal next Fall. Philbin is said
to make up for no talent by cheating well. Says Philbin of his decision
to attend Cal, "I'm in it for the free ride."
😴