106
Products
reviewed
936
Products
in account

Recent reviews by Wheels

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Showing 1-10 of 106 entries
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
122.2 hrs on record (117.6 hrs at review time)
It's good!
Posted 6 May, 2024.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
1.0 hrs on record
So, this game is space Subnautica. You'd think that would be a formula for a recommendation.

This game's writing is alluded to in the trailers, but it's a huge flaw. While I will say that this is the first piece of media in a year to get a genuine belly laugh out of me, it's like saying that "well, you did hit the target with the shotgun so full credit."

I was a fan of the unrelenting pace of Borderlands' jokes, but this cranks it up exponentially and just doesn't ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ stop. It doesn't have a subtle bone in its body, and its sense of comedic timing is to drown you in punchlines. Is sense of humor is best summed up as *oppressive*

Posted 8 March, 2021.
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1 person found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
23.2 hrs on record (22.5 hrs at review time)
This game is everything that I love about sci fi that is lacking in modern media.
Posted 20 February, 2021.
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2 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
47.7 hrs on record (7.8 hrs at review time)
I have played this game for literally years. I have had complaints about it, but the developers are transparent, the content continually improving, and the core gameplay loop solid and that it was on an unavoidably ♥♥♥♥♥♥ launcher, the Xbox app.

So, now that I bought it again on steam, I don't really have many complaints at the moment.
Posted 5 June, 2020.
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1 person found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
153.2 hrs on record (92.2 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
One of the best games on steam. I was skeptical of taking this game out of 2D, but it is somehow even better in every way.
Posted 3 April, 2020.
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2 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
15.3 hrs on record (12.0 hrs at review time)
Solid port so far. Fullscreen works better than other Arksys ports, appreciate the improvement.

Game just feels so *clean* mechanically.
Posted 5 June, 2018.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
15.3 hrs on record
The most frustrating thing about Undertale is how you can't talk about it. The game plays upon even your most base knowledge and assumptions about video game mechanics and tropes in such a way that even discussion of minor details (EVEN THE SOUNDTRACK) are spoilers.
And out of my entire time consuming media of all types, I cannot think of something that would be worse to spoil than Undertale. Thus, the most I can do is say "You will really, really like this game. You should, must, NEED to play this game." and contribute to the buzz that makes people (including me at first) assume it is just a meme filled shallow experience with an annoying fanbase. From a causal glance, how can this stupid thing full of furries made by some dork *gamemaker* in his parent's basement possibly compete with Fallout 4, and MGS V for what seems like everyone's GOTY 2015?
So please, when I say this, do not read any more into the statement than the statement.

You will really, really like this game. You should, must, NEED to blind buy and play this game.
Posted 12 January, 2016. Last edited 23 November, 2016.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
0.7 hrs on record (0.4 hrs at review time)
Wonderful experimentation with the FPS genre. Artsy, by intention (perhaps to its detriment). The game is fiddly, but by intention. Every action the PC in another game would take when you hit "R" you have to do in sequence. If you do it wrong, the guns jam and you have to go through a completely different sequence as you eject the mag, clear the chamber, and reinsert rounds into the magazine.
Should be given to anyone that claims that FPSes train people to use guns :V
Reccommended as a romp. Get it on sale.
Posted 1 February, 2015.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
1,439.9 hrs on record (1,073.9 hrs at review time)
I spend a lot of time playing DOTA 2. In a lot of ways, I think it to be the one of the best realized form of the competitive video game. The 100+ heroes all play and must be played against differently leading to interesting and varied team comps. The competitive scene is well known and regarded. The meta evolves in ways that are unexpected and wonderful. Every choice you make ultimately has an impact from the very first minute, and in some cases the ones before the clock starts!
The depth upon depth upon deput has a price; the learning curve of this game is more akin to a brick wall. Your personal failures don't just hinder your team and yourself, but actually empower the opposing team as well leading to an acerbic community that is wary and cruel to newcomers unjustly. The best guide for the game that I'm aware of is titled "Welcome to DOTA; You Suck" ( http://www.purgegamers.com/welcome-to-dota-you-suck )
DOTA 2 may be one of the best competitive games ever made. And nobody should play it.
Posted 1 February, 2015.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
2.6 hrs on record
"A step forward for the medium" is not something I say lightly. That being said, Brothers is a step forward for the medium of gaming. Wordless storytelling masterfully done and conveys the emotion of the player characters to in a very, very tangible mechanical sense. *Must* play. Bring hankies.
Posted 3 January, 2015.
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Showing 1-10 of 106 entries