Recent reviews by detc

The only game that can reliably surprise me despite 400+ hours of play. If you love to learn and challenge yourself, this is the best game ever made because you will never stop finding new ways to end your run. It's also a design masterpiece, initially appearing as chaos but if you keep your head and pay attention it slowly reveals itself to be a highly consistent system of carefully scoped randomness. Most important of all, it's wicked fun.

I've seen people call Spelunky 2 the Dark Souls of platformers, and I don't think that's really accurate. Spelunky 2 is much harder.

'hmm today i think i will build a unidirectional token ring network joining all endpoints' <-- clueless

Here are those bats you ordered.

Insipid writing, gunplay that's either trivially simple or obnoxious trial-and-error depending on the difficulty, ENDLESS UNSKIPPABLE CUTSCENES FOR LITERALLY EVERY CONCEIVABLE ACTION. Oh, you wanted to move to a new room? CUTSCENE! Wanted to press a button? CUTSCENE. None of it adds anything to the game, just yanks control from the player for no reason but to hear yet more unbelievably tortured Dan Houser dialogue. Jesus. When this game came out I was a little bothered there wasn't an option for BR subs, even as a new game+ sort of thing. Now I'm grateful there aren't because the dialogue I can understand is already too ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ painful.

Rockstar's technology fetish reduces Payne from a graceful angel of death to something more closely approximating an 80 kilo sack of ♥♥♥♥ being flung around a room. Liked how clean and precise shotdodging was in the first two games? Too bad, hope you like smacking into walls and every other possible surface like a moron. Thank you Rockstar, without your efforts I never would have come to realize that more technology and ~realism~ (lol) does not mean better games.

Stunningly unfun and so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ annoying in how it appears as if you have control only to realize (over and over) that you don't and you're playing a half-baked, glitzy engine tech demo. What a miserable, clunky conclusion (God I hope) to the series. Just go replay 2 again, this isn't worth the money or time.

You can play the lute. You can make your character Mario with a big hammer. You can throw turds. You can feel superior to others based on your weapon of choice. You can get gnomed.

Also, the melee combat works as depicted in promotions and is bulletproof in its consistency (generally and especially compared to similar games of this sort). First melee combat in a Medieval-setting game that I can say I have consistent fun playing around with. I mostly can't even get that salty because when I die it's because I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up, not because of someone bugging out mechanics or a 20' long sword made of lag.

Good game.

This is a fun little game, Unix terminal knowledge is useful but not required beyond the basics. If you're the sort of person who enjoys fiddling around in other people's ♥♥♥♥ surrupticiously this is your game. If you do happen to know some Unix stuff, a lot of common real-world terminal programs alias to actual game features (like less aliases to cat for reading text files for example). The hacking minigame part is fairly simple and the "memory" mechanic is a clever way of making you have to think ahead.

If I had one request, it'd be to implement rudimentary Bash and shell scripting as well as build in a little more junk that requires thinking to manage (ex. more dummy processes when invoking ps). Or maybe it's already there and I'm just not far enough into the game yet. Also file management needs a little work, my /home is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ mess after just invoking scp * in every folder on every system I come through. Either way, good fun.

For those on the fence, one of the first "real" jobs you get is stealing Centucky Fried Chicken's secret recipe. I am become Hackerman.

replaced a mechanically decent if ageing game with one that is designed from the ground up to make a billion dollars every year. unfortunately a game that makes a billion dollars every year is necessarily not one that's meant to be enjoyable or fun or really anything other than a toxic mix of addictive and frustrating so i'm gonna have to give this sucker a thumbs down *price is right fail noise*

Despite still being in early access and far from a complete game, Tripwire has seen fit to add hats and microtransactions ala TF2. Until they complete the game, I can't recommend buying it as it's unclear whether or not they'll ever finish adding the promised content.

E: It's 2019, game's done and has been for a while. Pretty fun too. Definitely worth a recommendation now, I was pretty salty about them putting in lootboxes before, say, the Sharpshooter class but w/e. Water under the bridge.

you can fly boats around at half the speed of sound

i recommend you do not buy this game