36
Products
reviewed
6486
Products
in account

Recent reviews by 💀  ⁧⁧ₛₓₙ

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Showing 1-10 of 36 entries
1,305 people found this review helpful
555 people found this review funny
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112
0.2 hrs on record
There comes a time in every man's life when he needs to take a look at himself in the mirror and wonder how exactly he reached such a place.
You have to truly ponder what decisions you have made along the way that brought you to the place of your final reckoning.

It is still unclear, even to me, even to God perhaps, why I purchased Only Fap Simulator 4..
There isn't anything wrong with it, with those nudity scenes throughout it's perfectly stellar. But when you look at it as a choice, you realize just how flawed you and the rest of humanity is.

What drove me to purchase such a game? What part of my soul felt so empty that I thought a virtual girl could fill it?
When I look into the boundless depths of my own loneliness I see a pool of reflection. My face isn't there, there is no face. There are only tears in that pool, tears of shame and loss and confusion.

If it were up to me again I know I would purchase it in a heartbeat, I know I would load it up and skip through the countless window prompts so I can have a single morsel of pornographic images which are readily available online.
Yet, despite the abundance of naked virtual women waiting in the digital sphere, I still chose to purchase this game and devote hours of my life to it. That time will never return to me, it is lost just like my soul and just like the time I fear I may never find it again.

There is something broken within me, something that desires sensation beyond my reach, something that whimpers every single night with the knowledge that there is no true Princess, it is a merely an illusion.
In my pursuit to find meaning in this long life, I sought the colorful lights and sounds of a world that only exists in a pop up window on my computer.

I am unsure what the moral of this review is, I am unsure about my place within the universe, all I know is that no amount of virtual girls can cure the vast rot that has overtaken me.
Posted 13 November, 2022. Last edited 13 November, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
This review has been banned by a Steam moderator for violating the Steam Terms of Service. It cannot be modified by the reviewer.
3,715 people found this review helpful
1,620 people found this review funny
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177
114.1 hrs on record (12.7 hrs at review time)
(Review text hidden)
Posted 27 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
477 people found this review helpful
127 people found this review funny
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37
0.5 hrs on record
You came here for a review, but youre leaving with a Pumpkin Pie Recipe that'll please all your homies this spooky season!

Ingredients
Pat-in-the-Pan Pastry
- 1 1/3 cups all-purpose flour
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/3 cup vegetable oil
- 2 tablespoons cold water

Filling
- 2 eggs
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
- 1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
- 1 can (15 oz) pumpkin (not pumpkin pie mix)
- 1 can (12 oz) evaporated milk

Sweetened Whipped Cream
- 3/4 cup whipping cream
- 2 tablespoons sugar

Steps

1. Heat oven to 425°F. In medium bowl, mix flour, 1/2 teaspoon salt and the oil with fork until all flour is moistened. Sprinkle with cold water, 1 tablespoon at a time, tossing with fork until all water is absorbed. Shape pastry into a ball. Press in bottom and up side of 9-inch glass pie plate.

2. In large bowl, beat eggs slightly with wire whisk or hand beater. Beat in 1/2 cup sugar, the cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon salt, ginger, cloves, pumpkin and milk.

3. To prevent spilling, place pastry-lined pie plate on oven rack before adding filling. Carefully pour pumpkin filling into pie plate. Bake 15 minutes.

4. Reduce oven temperature to 350°F. Bake about 45 minutes longer or until knife inserted in center comes out clean. Place pie on cooling rack. Cool completely, about 2 hours.

5. In chilled medium bowl, beat whipping cream and 2 tablespoons sugar with electric mixer on high speed until stiff peaks form. Serve pie with whipped cream. Store in refrigerator.

DONE, Enjoy ur spooky pie.
Posted 23 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
5,396 people found this review helpful
44 people found this review funny
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129
78.5 hrs on record (0.2 hrs at review time)
No additional account, no unnecessary launcher, no denuvo, no epic exclusivity, no microtransactions, just a video game as it always should be..
Posted 19 October, 2022. Last edited 22 November, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
153 people found this review helpful
134 people found this review funny
3
2
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7
0.2 hrs on record
⢸             ⡷⡄             
⢸              ⡇ ⣀           
⢸                ⡇    ⢦⡀     Are you winning son?
⢸    ⢀    ⢤     ⡇      ⢦⡀    
⢸  ⣀⢤⣼⣀     ⡄  ⡇        ⢄    
⢸   ⡤ ⡒  ⡊ ⡏ ⢀ ⡇           ⡄ 
⢸     ⣀⣀⣀⣀⢀    ⡇           ⡇ 
⢸    ⣀   ⢉      ⡇           ⢸
⢸     ⢱⡖        ⡇           ⢸
⢸     ⢺ ⢄⣀  ⣀⣀  ⡇           ⢸
⢸     ⢸    ⡽  ⡆ ⡇           ⢸
⢸  ⣰  ⢸         ⡇           ⢸
⢸     ⢸⢄         ⡇          ⢸
⢸     ⢸ ⢇        ⡇          ⢸
⢸     ⡌  ⡆       ⡇          ⢸
⢸        ⡇       ⡇          ⢸
⢸    ⢸            
Posted 17 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
This review has been banned by a Steam moderator for violating the Steam Terms of Service. It cannot be modified by the reviewer.
282 people found this review helpful
134 people found this review funny
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44
0.3 hrs on record
(Review text hidden)
Posted 14 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
238 people found this review helpful
209 people found this review funny
11
2
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4.2 hrs on record (0.2 hrs at review time)
Scorn is what my insides look like after a taco bell binge.
Posted 14 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
282 people found this review helpful
107 people found this review funny
4
9
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13.2 hrs on record (0.2 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
I'm polish and can confirm this is 100% realistic polish priest simulator
Posted 6 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
245 people found this review helpful
23 people found this review funny
11
4
2
16.0 hrs on record
Thanks to this game i realized how much I love and appreciate my GF…
Posted 27 September, 2022. Last edited 1 October, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
115 people found this review helpful
72 people found this review funny
1
15.5 hrs on record (1.0 hrs at review time)
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿ ⢻⣿ ⢉⣀⣤    ⣴⣶⣄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟          ⣾⣿⡿        ⢻⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿   ⣀⡤            ⣴⣾⣿⣷⣶⣤⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿   ⢀⡴  ⢀         ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
     ⣰            ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
      ⢀⡾         ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
                 ⣿⣿⣿⣿  ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
                       ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀       ⣀⣀ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⡟ ⢿⣿⡿ ⣿⡿   ⢿⣿⡿ ⢿⣿  ⣿⣿ ⢿⣿ ⢻⣿⡿ ⢻
⣿⡄ ⡿ ⢰⣿ ⢰⣷⡆ ⣿⡇ ⢸⣿   ⣿ ⢸⣿ ⢸⡟ ⣰⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡄  ⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⡇ ⣿⡇ ⢸⣿ ⢰⡀  ⢸⣿    ⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⡇ ⣿⡇ ⢸⣿ ⢸⣧  ⢸⣿  ⣷⡀ ⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣇⣀⣿⣿⣿⣤⣈⣉⣁⣴⣇⣀⣸⣿⣀⣸⣿⣇⣀⣸⣿⣀⣸⣿⣧⣀⣹⣿
Posted 15 September, 2022.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
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Showing 1-10 of 36 entries