this guide will cover all of the secrets but not achievements of the game and will assume you have the dlcs (I've written this guide already but I accidentally deleted it while making it so sorry if it's a little fast paste and lack of explanation or directions and that's why the title says simplified for cavemen)
Name last duck "LSDina"
Name cartoon rubber hose duck "Hedy"
This gives unique 4 digit code
Put code on door
Remember domino pattern
Press duck button
Grab soda
Name last ducks please duck "Turbolento" for dev posters
Click big robot
Press red button
Wait 10 minutes then wait for duck to enter tunnel
Switch cameras to cave/end of tunnel
Press black button
Recreate domino pattern on lights, remember password
Go back to robot
Click computer
Insert codes:
g.toto
Your unique password from light puzzle
dir
cd forsaken folder
dir
open Texture.db
cd..
cd log
dir
open error.log
Take break from insert codes and read new password, replace x with 2 y with 6 and z with 4
Now set your password to tv ducks name (he was from black button on light thing earlier)
Now go back to computer and put these codes:
cd..
cd sys
dir
spawner.exe
now grab soda
Get pig bank duck
Get thief duck
Get arcade duck
Theif take coin from pig bank and play arcade
Beat mini game
Remember code
Get safe duck
Set safe duck name to code
Open safe duck
Collect last file
Replay arcade duck
Grab soda item
Get dopamine I mean new duck
Anime eyes duck is named "Sakura" does nothing in game
If 30 hours of playtime on steam then kung dubby spawns in infinity cool after 30 minutes, he is there till deload and will come back every 30 hours
Event ducks spawn July 6th (game birthday), Halloween, and Christmas, their events last about a week and can also be gotten if a player in multiplayer has them, they will also appear in old saves and can be toggled on new ones
The first 3 are unique to quacking the ice and spawn from duck interactions
The next 4 are unique to infinity cool, 3 are from UFO and the last one is from bunker (scroll back up)
The next 3 are from hippospace and require a bit of interacting:
Click big robot
Click red button
Hope classic duck swaps places with ufo duck
If they don't then either reload your save or read astronaut duck part
After 10 minutes cave opens in tunnel
Wait for duck to hit yellow teleporter
If the seat is free they will become 2nd attempt to get ufo duck
If not then they enter space shuttle and astronaut duck spawns
Enter cave
Press black button
Go back to dlc section and do so many ducks puzzle