I am infertile from eating scented candles. The

The motortrend-awarded 2020 F-350 has everything you need to
Haul as many bulls as possible to your loving wife
Built for BBC tough
At Ford Truck Month, we make cars that go vroom vroom
We sell to w*men at a 50 percent markup
She makes me poop snarl and I make her pee
We preform under the table sex change surgeries for minors
We stormed the capital because the 17th letter of the alphabet told us to

I don't think most people truly grasp the significance of how they've fitted the hydrocoptic marzel vanes. When I was still a kid in college, I lost a dear friend of mine in an engineering class when a waneshaft started side fumbling so hard that it lost ambifacence. The spurving bearings couldn't handle the panometric load and they shattered. Killed him instantly. It's been over fifty years, and I still have nightmares where I see the stator embedded in his skull, whirring around and leaving semi-boloid patterns carved into his scalp. People love to give Rockwell ♥♥♥♥ because of the way they couple their tremipipes, but the fact is, their design saves lives.

My ♥♥♥♥ is so big and ginormous its like at the LEAST 20 inches long and as girthy as a paper towel roll its so huge and ♥♥♥♥ so hard its like a fire hose and as solid as a brick god when I ♥♥♥ I can literally put out fires for how much semen I can produce PLUS I have no refractory period lads and laddies please come ♥♥♥♥ me I'm so lonely

I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once.
It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake.

PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡
PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡
PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡
NO DRACULAS 🚫🧛‍♂
NO MUMMY 🚫🤕
NO ALIEN 🚫👽
NO DUENDE 🚫👺
ACTIVATE ALARM 🚨‼

hey, twilightsparklelover911! i'm an admin from PinkieCraft, the pony roleplay Minecraft server that you play on! i wanted to personally extend my thank you for the 1000$ you donated to help keep our server alive! next time you log on our server make sure to let me know and i'll make sure to get you that custom pony body you donated for! i regret to inform you, however, that we don't currently have a way to give you "20 foot horse c ock" like you requested but we'll work on it!! thank you for the donation again and we hope to see you soon!!!!!!!! KEEP CLOPPING MY FRIEND!!!

Sincerely

PinkieCraft ERP 24/7 active Server Co-admin

When a simp walks into a room, he brings his whole vibe with him. He has a million reasons for being cringe. Just ask him. If you listen, he’ll tell you how he got sus. How he forgot where he was balling - then, he woke up. If you listen, he’ll tell you about the time he thought he had drip and dreamt of being a chad. And then he’ll smile, no cap, content that he realized the squad isn’t gang. We’re based because we want so much more. We’re cringe because we get these things and wish for what we had.

>Pushin' P
>Down bad
>Bro down tremendously
>Caught bro lacking
>Caught in 4k
>Deadass
>No cap
>Goated
>Cant miss
>Opps
>Slide
>Finna
>Finna buss
>Prolly
>Bussin
>Mid
>Mid asf
>Fr
>Hella
>On god
>On gang
>Ong
>Tf
>Asf
>Asl
>Ash
>L
>Take an L
>Walking L
>L + ratio
>W
>Man's is
>My mans is/was
>X-ussy (bussy, wheelchairussy, etc)
>Is it grippy
>Harambe gorilla grip kitty
>Bro (did x)
>Bro really said (emoji)
>Clout demon
>Facts
>Fax
>Straight facts
>Fire
>Straight fire
>Last night was a movie
>Goofy ahh
>it's giving x vibes
>issa whole vibe
>mood

Sat my wife down today to tell her news that there's no more Pro Magic Players. We cried, held each other, and then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's house for the week.

Because if You have the lower body and you have no upper body, you got a problem building...wait a minute. You have the upper body, and you have no legs, you got a problem building your legs. You have the upper...you have the lower body and you don't have the upper body, the upper body, it is easier to build. So if you have the lower body and you don't have the upper body, it is easier to build the upper body. You have the upper body and you don't have the legs, you got a problem building the lower body... No, you don't understand. You have the upper body, but you don't have the lower body, you got a problem building downstairs. You got the up- legs on the bottom, it is easier to build on the top, so you don't have much as a problem. Yeah.

Been trying to put on a good face since I lost my ape but I gotta be honest. This was my kids college. My mortgage. Just absolute ♥♥♥♥ that some of you out there think it's okay that I got ripped off. ♥♥♥♥ you if you think theft is okay because I wasn't "smart" enough.

Halo is a pretty cool guy. Eh kills Allen's and doesn't afraid of anything

I love my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ car so much

2022 BMW m340i xDrive. And just put in a AWE track exhaust suite. Spoiler on the way, catted downpipe coming soon. The never ending black hole of mods ♥♥♥♥♥♥.

Literally have never loved anything more. God, it’s just so sexy and it sounds so good. Driving it is better than sex, better than ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. If I could ♥♥♥♥ my car, I wouldn't, I'd only make sweet love to it.

Sorry, I just have this overwhelming feeling of love for it that I had to express this somewhere, somehow.

Edit: I love this car because it makes me feel excited to wake up, something I have not felt for a very long time.

extemporaneous

YOU CAN DO IT
MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE
PRETEND YOUR LIFE IS ANIME
JUST DO WHATEVER WHO CARES
YOU'VE GOT ONE LIFE AND FOR THE REST OF TIME YOU WILL BE A STORY YOUR KIDS OR NEPHEWS OR RANDOS TELL
MAKE IT A GOOD ONE
HAVE VODKA EVERY DAY TO KILL INHIB
I BELIVE IN YOU
TSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Born in a mountain
Raised in a cave
Truckin' and ♥♥♥♥♥♥'
That is all I crave

babe, i'm breaking up with you. it's not you, you were poggers. it's me, i'm omegalul. im sorry if this is pepehands but it has to be done, i've just been feeling pepega and our relationship has been weirdchamp for months, it's time to end it, no kappa.

*jaw 🏺 drops 👇👎🙅‍♂️ to floor 🤣, eyes 👀 pop 💥 out of sockets 😚😊 accompanied 🤕 by trumpets 🎺, heart ❤ beats 🔨👿👊 out of chest 💓, awooga 📢 awooga 📢 sound 🔊 effect 💀, pulls 🐙☝ chain ⛓ on 🔛 train 🚂 whistle 📯 that has appeared 🤔😐 next 👉 to head 💆 as steam 💨 blows 💥 out, slams 💢 fists 👊 on 🔛 table 😐, rattling ☢ any plates 🍽, bowls 🍀 or silverware 🍴, whistles 😗 loudly 🔊, fireworks 🎆 shoot 🔫 from top 🔼 of head 💆, pants 👖 loudly 🔊🎚 as tongue 👅😉 hangs 🔛 out of mouth 💋, wipes 🧻 comically 😂 large 👆 bead 🕳 of sweat 💦 from forehead 🙆, clears 😋😉 throat 🍆👅👀, straightens 🎓 tie 👔®, combs 👨 hair 💇🏿‍♀️* Ahem 🗣, you 👈 look 👀👅 very 👌🍀 lovely 😊.

RIOT SHIELD RIOT SHIELD
I’M A ♥♥♥♥♥ THAT USES RIOT SHIELD
YUM YUM YUM YUM
I EAT ♥♥♥♥ ALL DAY

'm'a'xe you sumthin

*sniffs*
*wipes nose*
*looks at you in disbelief*
*pretends hes gonna say something*
*wildly swings arms into the air*
*rubs head*
*points at you but doesn't say anything, the words wont come out*
*squats*
*ayo rick*
*mask yousumtin*

ATTENTION ALL NAZI GAMERS.

Adolf Hitler is in real trouble and he needs your help to save the FATHERLAND from the COMMIES. To do this, he's gonna need some Stg-44s and a couple Königstiger Heavy Panzers. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three digits on the back, and the expiration month and year. But you have to be quick, so our glorious führer can turn Generalplan Ost into reality and secure our GROßDEUTSCHES REICH.

Are you aware I have a ritual called 'terminator'. I crouch in the shower in the "naked terminator" pose. With eyes closed I crouch for a minute and visualize either Arnie or the guy from the 2nd movie. I then start to hum the T2 theme. Slowly I rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me get through my day. Wbu babe? x

The draw four card is better than the reverse card, undoubtedly. The card has the ability to completely reverse a game when it's approaching the end, and the card depends on no factors rather than the reverse card depending on your opponent being a dumbass. The draw 4 card can ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ruin a game for someone who's already reached uno. The reverse card can't do anything like that. The reverse card is only useful as a defense card, and that ♥♥♥♥ is not gonna get you anywhere when you're about to lose and your opponent is at Uno. The draw 4 is a game winner and the reverse card is dependent on so many factors that half the time you'll have it in your deck and just never ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ use it. The draw 4 card is the best card in Uno, and anyone who disagrees is objectively wrong.

Just me and my 💕mommy💕, hanging out I got pretty hungry💦 so I started to pout 😞 She asked if I was down ⬇for something yummy 😍💦 and I asked what and she said she'd give me her 💦milkies!💦 Yeah! Yeah!💕💦 I drink them!💦 I slurp them!💦 I swallow them whole💦 😍 It makes 💘mommy💘 😊happy😊 that her breasts are sore... 💕💦😫More mommy! More!! 😫💦💕 1 milkies💦, 2 milkies💦💦, 3 milkies💦💦💦, 4💦💦💦💦 I'm 💘mommy's💘 👶little baby 👶 and she's my candy store! 💟 She is so squishy💗!She makes me feel good💜! 💘💘💘She fills me up like a mommy should!~ 💘💘💘 👶💦💘Wa-What!💘💦👶

Hey! Did you send me this message? You want to "Convert" me into your "ass slave and totally maul" me, "open up the ass fully... fist?" And you "listen or watch" and I'm "welcome to use" your "spare bedroom" and "boots, trainers, sneakers, and gloves are hot but not optional"? As you "Teach me"? And "If you bathe don't even bother, because your ♥♥♥♥ is the size of a Iceland frozen cocktail sausage"? ?????

It doesn't matter. Listen kid you don't want to see my other side. I have a wolf inside me with a muzzle on, but the muzzle is about to come off. You broke her heart, and I will break yours. She is a nice girl, how dare you use her like this. How come people like you get to date her? Then people like me have to sit in the shadows and be the shoulders to cry on. Listen Kid, I don't have time for ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ games. I am a nice guy, but when you make a nice guy angry; the world shakes. Don't do it again.

hi, wanna grab a sodi? xP

I just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ love Rick and Morty, in the way that I ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ love science. It's so random and cool - it's like the show was designed for us Redditors, see? My mom says I have an unhealthy obsession with the show, but she just doesn't understand how funny it. I wish I could live in the Rick and Morty world and be their friends. Everything would be really and cool and funny if I did. Rick and Morty are so funny and I'm so awesome that it would make perfect sense, but it'd be even better if Bernie Sanders appeared. It'd be so awesome I'd turn up the TV in the common room of my dorm up all the way so everyone could hear the greatness of Bernie Sanders, Ron Paul, bacon, weed, atheism, The Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy, Sweden, Bill Nye, 90s cartoons, cats, and ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ loving science.

I run the Rick and Morty Club at my school - we come together, browse Reddit, make some Deadpool memes and watch Rick and Morty. We don't talk to each other but there's a cute girl there I'm gonna try and ask out. I'm a nice guy and I dress well (fedora + trench coat + brown-stained underwear + well-trimmed beard lightly seasoned with dust and corn syrup) so I just know I've got a good chance with her. I've already messaged her on Facebook, I just haven't got a response yet.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand: Rick and Morty! My favorite character is Rick because his style of humor perfectly reflects that of Reddit. I bet if I asked him "When does the narwhal bacon?", he'd know EXACTLY what I was talking about. Also, did you notice he looks like Bernie Sanders if you squint a bit and use your imagination? This can't be a coincidence; MLG Illuminati confirmed. Yeah, that's right, I look at montage parodies too. What good Redditor doesn't? Lenny face, Illuminati, and Doge are so funny. If I met Rick and Morty I'd be sure to show them all those funny and awesome memes and more!

Yours baconly, Atheist92

mene gene made a machine
joe blow made it go
ART ART BLEW A FART
AND BLEW THE WHOLE DAMN THING APART

DUDE DEPRESSION IS A REAL ILLNESS I WOULD KNO

It isn't. Man the ♥♥♥♥ up.

>brain chemistry
Every emotion you have is instantiated in brain chemistry.

>b-b-but doctors have written it down in a manual
Okay, then "♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥" is now a mental illness because I just made it up and wrote it down here. You have ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ if you believe everything that others tell you.

"Depression" is an emotion, get over it, get over yourself, grow some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ balls.

You CANNOT prove to me that it is anything other than just sadness. Prove it. You'll say:

>YOU'VE NEVER FELT IT, SO YOU DON'T KNOW
Yeah I have, and I've been on SSRIs, and I know that it's just a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ emotion you limp-wristed cuckolds.

You genuinely CANNOT prove that it is anything other than sadness.

>OH THEY'VE DONE BRAIN SCANS, AND DEPRESSED BRAINS LOOK DIFFERENT
Again that's no different from any other emotion. Sorry, not proof.

Go ahead, try. Protip: you can't.

I moved in a mostly Hebrew city and when i go for a walk i have to make sure i leave my wallet close to me.

I'm scared that the Jews might see it and start prodding it with their long Jewish nose.

I heard stories about a man dropping his wallet and a pack of Jews came and stabbed him to
death with their noses and took the money. The cops found him later with over 100 holes in his body.

I have kids and I fear for them.

What should i do?

PLEASE HELP!

>Pawn Stars

>Not taking the Picker Pill

>Pawn Stars bow to pickers
>In contact with hillbillies
>Possess picker-like abilities, masters of 'The Bundle'
>Control middle America with an iron but fair fist
>Own rusty signs & lampshades globally
>Direct descendants of the ancient picker blood line
>Will bankroll the first cities in Iowa (Pickergrad will be be the first city)
>Own 99% of Scrap metal research facilities on Earth
>First designer babies will in all likelihood be coke machines from the 50s
>both pickers said to have 215+ IQ, such intelligence on Earth has only existed deep in Iowan barns & Area 51
>Native American scriptures tell of two angels who will descend upon Earth and will bring an era of enlightenment and old NASCAR jump suits

>They own Indian motorcycle labs around the world
>You likely have Indian motorcycles inside you right now
>The Pickers are in regular communication with the Archangels Michael and Gabriel, forwarding the word of rusty children's bicycles to the Orthodox Church. Who do you think set up the meeting between the pope & the Orthodox high command (First meeting between the two organisations in over 1000 years) and arranged the Orthodox leader’s first trip to Antarctica in history literally a few days later to the picker bunker in Wilkes land?
>They learned fluent Hillbilly in under a week
>Nation states entrust their glass coke bottle reserves with the duo.
>The pickers are about 7 decades old, from the space-time reference point of the base human currently accepted by our society
>use picking as a front to gain access to top secret places

NO HAHA WOMEN ARE ALL DUMB STUPID VAPID PILES OF ♥♥♥♥ AND THEY HAVE NO OPINIONS AND CAN'T THINK FOR ♥♥♥♥ THEY ARE TRASH GARBAGE USELESS PILES OF ♥♥♥♥ THAT ARE ONLY GOOD FOR THEIR WARM HOLE. HAHA. ALL THEY CARE ABOUT ARE LIKE CELEBRITIES AND BABIES AND ♥♥♥♥♥♥ MAKEUP TUTORIALS AND ♥♥♥♥. THEY AREN'T SMART LIKE ME.

>“Hey ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥,
>My name is Galbaldy β, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any ♥♥♥♥? I mean, I guess it’s fun fapping to futa hentai, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on Pixiv.
>Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I have a hot pink paint job, and an 8-inch flaccid ♥♥♥♥. What's you armament, other than "Tiny, non-mecha ♥♥♥♥”? I also get titianium alloy armor, and have a banging hot futa girlfriend (I just blew her despite not having a mouth; ♥♥♥♥ was SO cash). You are all ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
>Pic Related: It’s me and my ♥♥♥♥♥"

A trainful of Jews on their way to the ovens is hurtling down the track towards five tied-up ♥♥♥♥♥♥s. You are on a bridge over which the train will pass. If the train collides with the ♥♥♥♥♥♥s, the Jews will escape and go on to open a bank which gives preferential loans to hispanic and African immigrants for homes in your neighborhood. However, you can shove a sexy tripcode poster onto the tracks so she can untie the ♥♥♥♥♥♥s; but they will then rape her and you won't get any sex from her for proving you're a cool racist. Should you proceed?

^^^／l、
（ﾟ､ ｡ ７
 ‎|、ﾞ ~ヽ
 じしf_, )ノ Meow

hey, sorry i saw your profile and i just thought you looked cute in your picture. i really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha! I don't know why it's a guy thing honestly im like really against misogyny and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play l4d2 sometime its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirtring i swear im just trying to be friendly i really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy i don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk you look really nice and fun xxx

It has come to my attention that some have lately called me a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, as if such a term were shameful. I ask you, what greater endeavor exists than that of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? In our current unparalleled situation, refusal to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ is simply a refusal to contribute--an insistence on the community's suicide, if you will.
Did the lungfish refuse to breathe air? It did not. It crept forth boldly while its brethren remained in the blackest ocean abyss, with lidless eyes forever staring at the dark, ignorant and doomed despite their eternal vigilance. Would we model ourselves on the trilobite? Are all the accomplishments of the Half-Life series fated to be nothing more than a layer of Orange Box demo disks thinly strewn across the GameStop bargain bin, sandwiched between the mediocre Sonic games and Maddens of years long gone?

In order to be true to our nature, and our destiny, we must aspire to greater things. We have outgrown our ability to be patient. It is futile to cry for HL3, when our true sustenance awaits us in Valve headquarters. And only the form of online entertainment that small minds call '♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥' can carry us there.
Therefore I say, yes, I am a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. We must all ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, willingly, eagerly, if we expect to reap the benefits of our community. And reap we shall.

hey cutie~how old are you? if youre atleast 18 we should maybe meet irl and ill play with you i saw you play tf2,dota,and csgo and maybe we could cyber sex on mic in game and make everyone feel lewd from us being lewd~if you want to snapchat or kik just pm me,and ill always be up to us exchanging facebooks.a littler about me:im japanese,18,kinda short x3,kinky,pale,skinny,and bi.if (you want pics just ask).anyways,if you want to actually like date or something add me~i wont add you first though,if you add me ill know you want to date,if i add first imight have to face another rejection...and get depressed n stuff.anyways,i love you,hope you consider~!nya~!

K so I'm a dude and I'm going to sound like a real weirdo (though it's deserved), but I think it's relevant to the discussion. I play a Keeper of the moon Miqo'te because....well...I gender identify much more with femininity.
I mentioned this to a berating post towards people that jack off to their video game characters because not all of us do

I always roll as a female in any game I play because psychologically I am much more in tune with womanhood than manliness. I'm unquestioningly straight (I did question it once since so many people think I'm gay but I very quickly learned that I am undoubtedly, irreversibly straight), I'm pretty athletic as a triathlete, and I work for the military.
But all around....I just kinda wish I was a girl really. I'd fit in to this world a lot easier if I was. A fantasy world though is the perfect place to do that. I can still be me, it isn't like I especially dislike being a man or that I resent my Y chromosome, or anything silly like that. But I can venture out and accurately psychologically mimic who I really am.

So why Miqo'te then? Well, I'll admit to having a bit of a catgirl kink but in full honesty, they are just really adorable. My character is really dainty with most sliders at minimum (tail at max, boobs bigger too but honestly even at max they don't get very busty), and wears a lot of elegant clothes. Plus, there is a primal, bestial element there that kinda resonates with who I envision my character to be while still maintaining a cutesy aura.
So I guess my answer is pretty similar to yours. I just made a character that I can identify with more.

You're beautiful. Seriously. I've never seen you but I can guarantee you that you are. You are a woman. You are a female ♥♥♥♥ sapien. And for that reason you will always be a magnificent heralding of what millions of years of evolution has to offer, and men will find it mesmerizing. You are nature's work of art. You don't have to be the Mona Lisa or the sistine chapel to be beautiful. You have a lot to be proud of, honey. It's hard in our rigorously elitist society of late, but you are without a doubt attractive and appealing to the opposite (or same) sex. The tips in this thread will help, but confidence cannot be faked. Just know that you're fabulous and the world will follow you along.

Ｈｅｌｌｏ ｔｈｉｓ ｉｓ ｔｈｅ ａｄｍｉｎｉｓｔｒａｔｏｒ ｏｆ ＰｏｒｎＨｕｂ™ ｗｅ ｈａｖｅ ｎｏｔｉｃｅｄ ｙｏｕ ｈａｖｅｎ’ｔ ｌｏｇｇｅｄ ｉｎ ｆｏｒ ２ ｗｅｅｋｓ， ｗｅ’ｒｅ ｊｕｓｔ ｃｈｅｃｋｉｎｇ ｔｏ ｓｅｅ ｉｆ ｅｖｅｒｙｔｈｉｎｇ ｉｓ ｏｋａｙ ａｎｄ ｗｅ’ｖｅ ｐｒｅｐａｒｅｄ ｙｏｕ ａ ｌｉｓｔ ｏｆ ｖｉｄｅｏｓ ｆｒｏｍ ｙｏｕｒ ｆａｖｏｕｒｉｔｅ ｃａｔｅｇｏｒｙ （Putin）． Ｓｅｅ ｙｏｕ ｓｏｏｎ!